Thank You Ray Don

Boy Crazy!

2008-12-08T17:01:00.000-08:00

OK, so yes my last post was about being my own best boyfriend and I still stand behind that post. However...

In the past week or so, I am suddenly remembering how much fun it is to be boy crazy. You know, when you flirt with anyone halfway attractive when you're out in public. I am completely in this zone as I type this blog. The best thing about being boy crazy and being in a... shall I saw... older age bracket is that your flirting skills are at their height, especially if you have been single for most of those years that brought you to that age bracket.

For example, you know how to smile at the bartender for just long enough for him to notice you are paying attention but not so long that you seem like the creepy cougar at the bar. Another example is winking... when I used to wink at people I looked like John Cleese in a Monty Python skit, but now my confidence and age has allowed me to perfect the casual wink, again without making someone feel that they need to run away screaming.

I think another wonderful thing about being boy crazy at my age is that not only are your skills in top form, but there's a confidence level that reflects the feeling that if you're not with a guy, it's cool. You're strong enough to head home alone and see the good night for what is was, a nice night.

I occassionally get wrapped up in the stress of my life that my confidence level fades and I don't get to appreciate the little things like being boy crazy, but that's not the case today. I'm heading out in full force. I'm winking, I'm smiling, I'm laughing and tossing my hair simultaneously and I am enjoying every bit of it.

Whenever I get down girls... remind me of this post.

My Own Best Boyfriend

2008-11-18T10:39:00.000-08:00

Yes. I have decided that I am my own best boyfriend. Let's face it, I know exactly what I want to do, when I want to do it and where I want to do it. When I screw up and feel down, I buy myself my own flowers and let's face it, in the sack, I know exactly what works.

Let's just say, I have been dating someone and well... he's a nice guy and pleasant and smart, but anymore I just don't know if I am interested in being with someone more than once every other week. I enjoy taking care of myself and even though there are times, like when my car was broken in to, that I really need someone to cry on, I guess I realized that the best person for me, is me and maybe my dad... and you know... all you girls out there.

Maybe I am coming to the conclusion that, at 33, let's face it, I have figured out other outlets for my emotional and physical needs.

I MUST KNOW...

2008-11-14T10:57:00.000-08:00

Who out there is watching "Charm School: Rock of Love Girls." I just... I just don't know what to say. I mean, how do these girls live? And Heather, my Heather I think my love for that one is lost.

Oh, and I have hung up on the Real Housewives of Atlanta and it is exceptionally difficult for me to cut out an entire reality television series.

THIS is hospitality??

2008-11-13T07:40:00.000-08:00

Had a little bit of a rude awakening this morning.

I prepared myself for another day in this crazy "news" room, and yes, I will explain the quotes in a follow up post. So, I get ready to head out to the office and I decide, rather than walking, I am going to drive so I can stop and get some Starbuck's. And lo and behold, there is my lovely new convertible vw beetle, with a big fat smashed in window.

Now, I lived in a large city for about 13 years. I lived in many many many different apartments and actually had a few cars while I lived there and not ONCE was a broken in to. One month in a little southern town and what happens... vandalism. The crack head that smashed my window didn't even take anything. It wasn't even a robbery, it was just a vandalism.

Needless to say, I am sort of missing my Boston commute to work. You know... the commute on the bus in southie, surrounded by drunks and homeless people. I mean, at least those people left me alone.

Back in the Land of Cotton

2008-11-12T13:18:00.000-08:00

So, I think I should get back on this blog. Basically, I am back in the south and I have quite a few thoughts on what it's like to be back in the land of Suzanne, Julia, Mary Jo and Charlene. In all honesty, I have no idea how those women made it in this world, in this Dixieland South. Oh, now I remember... it was a T.V. show.

Well, I'm here to tell you boys and girls, life here is no sitcom.

Look for new stories involving southern boys, shrimp and grits, sunny weather and being a woman in a place where people still find you odd if you do not strive to be barefoot and pregnant.

Oh It's On!!

2008-01-15T19:52:00.000-08:00

That's right! My favorite guilty pleasure, "Rock of Love" is back on and it's even trashier. In all honesty though... I miss Heather aka Tatters! I mean, each week at elimnation I was on the edge of my seat to see what sort of Vegas- stripper dress she would be wearing.

Tuesday's Rotation, Back from Vacation

2008-01-11T18:17:00.000-08:00

The following rotation came from a friend of mine with outstanding musical taste. ENJOY!:

Apparently, I'm in the mood to listen to the bands that would have been in heavy rotation had I had a college radio show in the 90's. Granted, there would have also been a lot of the Cure/Depeche Mode/the Smiths/Morrissey/Joy Division/New Order and the Trash Can Sinatras. But rather than go that obvious, here are 5 other songs that I would have played:

1) "Be My Light, Be My Guide" - Gene: it was a bonus track on the US edition of "Olympian", and probably my favorite song on the album.

2) "If I Can't Change Your Mind" - Sugar (on "Besides"): I can't tell you the number of times I listened to this after telling some guy how I felt about him and getting turned down.

3) "Our Story" - The JudyBats (from the album "Down in the Shacks Where the Satellite Dishes Grow"): late 80's/early 90's alt-rock band from Tennessee, they were definitely a college radio station kind of band. It was hard for me to pick just 1 song by them - I still listen to all their albums. But I went with this, because there are few things that say boarding school/liberal arts college chick teen-angst than "I want you, but I really want to leave you too."

4) "Soul and Fire" - Sebadoh (from "Bubble & Scrape"): Sad. The end of a relationship. The lead singer, Lou Barlow, put out an album called "Emoh" a couple years ago - I recommend that as well.

5) "I Can't Escape from You" - The The (from "Hanky Panky"): a whole cover album of Hank Williams songs. So good. I love Matt Johnson's vocals.

Two honorable mentions:

a) also check out "Down in the Shacks Where the Satellite Dishes Grow" by the JudyBats- one of my all time favorite song lines: "I'm sorry but when I left you, you were an asshole, on those cold nights when you were out there, running 'round with your drunk friends"

b) "True Happiness This Way Lies..." on Dusk by The The: The intro is too true, but spoken, so I left that song off. Still, who hasn't felt like this? "Have you ever wanted something so badly that it possessed your body and your soul through the night and through the day until you finally get it? And then you realize that it wasn't what you wanted after all. And then those self-same, sickly little thoughts now go and attach themselves to something, or somebody, new. And the whole goddamn thing starts all over again."

Damn - now I'm all nostalgic. I want to go and dig out some mix cassette tapes from boarding school and college...

Cougar or Hyena

2008-01-11T16:53:00.000-08:00

Something very new has happened to me recently. I am not sure whether to it a trend quite yet or not and I am also not sure how comfortable I am with this occurrence. Basically, in the laws of the dating jungle, am I a cougar or a hyena?

I have just returned from a trip abroad. It was a wonderful experience and along the way I encountered many men and many boys. At this point in my dating career I am an expert on boys. However, meeting men on this trip was a new experience for me. While on my journey, I came to the conclusion that is was time for me to hang up the boys and try focusing on hanging out with some men. However, sometimes, when you make a decision about changing the path of your life, it can be difficult to embark down that road less traveled.

Right when I made this very adult decision, I came across a lovely man, a native of the country in which I was traveling. He was a great conversationalist, wearing an impeccable suit. He was smart and interested in speaking with me. I was so excited that I had made my decision and that I was embarking down this new road. And then... he left.

Now, if any of you reading this actually knows me, then you will know that I am the kind of person that must have instant gratification. So, when my first venture in to the adult world, did not pan out, well... I kind of lost interest in the venture. Furthermore, the night was still young and my traveling companion and I were not interested in packing it in for the evening.

We stuck around and hung out a bit longer with the adult's friends and wouldn't you know it, I happened to hit it off with another one of the guys in the group. This guy was an old standard of mine and by that I mean he was a boy... 22 years old a recent college graduate and to top it all off... the kid was a bookie. Yeah... well... where I was traveling, this was not an illegal endeavor.

Needless to say I forget about my foray in to male adults and proceed to carry on with this very young, very cute, very tall but not so bright little boy. The night goes on, a few bottles of champagne are passed around and then I am on my way back to his place for something else that I am familiar with at this point... meaningless, alcohol induced bad sex. The next day, I wake up, grab a cab home and that is the end of it.

This brings me to another recent event. That event being the alcohol saturated, meaningless holiday, New Years Eve. I was hanging out with friends, having a great time but considering heading home to polish off the rest of the chips and dip from our party. Then this kid starts dancing with me and chatting me up. An adorable kid, this one, but definitely a kid! 24 to be exact. This was a completely unsolicited occurrence. So... the kid is in to me and well... I am sort of in to him and well... you know where this is going, right? I mean, I had spoken with many "men" throughout the evening, but this kid was the only one I actually engaged.

The thing is, I have never really attracted younger guys. Old guys... they love me. I am not sure when or how things shifted in my sexual life, but apparently they have. What is it with this new demo? Is this how women become cougars? It just sort of happens? I mean, is there a demo of men that all of a sudden are attracted to older women? Is this a trend I am facing or just a fluke? Whichever or whatever it is, I don't want to embrace it.

I voiced my concern with a very wise friend of mine. This friend also happened to be there when both above initial instances occurred. This friend told me that I should not worry, that I wasn't the cougar. A cougar selects it's prey. I, on the other hand was more like... well... chum???

So, as long as I remember that a cougar is a predator and really... I don't have the time or energy for that, I think I will be ok. Actually, I think I am more of a Hyena. You know, traveling in a pack, laughing all day long over a shared meal... yes... I am much more of a Hyena.

With all of this said, if my next partner is under 24 years of age, I might have to reevaluate some things in my life. Until then, the search for adults continues...

Guest Blogger for Tuesday's Rotation

2007-11-14T09:56:00.000-08:00

Thought I would get you readers involved in this blog as well so today we will have a "guest" blogging their Top 5 favorite songs running through their iPod right now. So... here it goes. From my home girl in the Upper East Side:

1) No One- Alicia Keys- When did she get so saucy! Mary J Blige better look out...girl is sounding FIERCE! (yes, I said FIERCE)

2) Tim Gunn's Guide to Style Podcast My new guilty, guilty pleasure. I wish I could put Tim Gunn in my closet (fat chance) he would just pop out and dress me!

3) You Haven't Done Nothin- Stevie Wonder Stevie should be on EVERY rotation. I thought I'd mix it up with an oldie but goodie:) Quite

4) Los Angeles- The Rosewood Thieves A great little toe tapper courtesy of my friend Marc's band. Check them out! (shameless, shameless)

5) Inside and Out- Feist Bee Gees B side + Canadian Songstress (no not Celine)=Music GOLD... Delicious!!!!

So... Did You Call Him?

2007-11-14T09:14:00.000-08:00

Well, thought I would give you guys an honest follow up to my "Dead Man Walking" post. Here it goes.

Since November 8 I have definitely felt good about my decision to let the boy go but being the kind of person that lacks, shall we say, self control I was pretty nervous about whether or not I could make this decision stick. I mean, this was a ten year relationship!! I normally don't make it past the 3 week mark.

OK... so... I did fall off the wagon, but only a wee bit. I got right back on that wagon, I promise. I sent him a stupid text message. It didn't say anything, just one of those, "let's see if he responds" kinds of text messages. I know, I know... you don't need to say it, but if I didn't tell you then, that wouldn't be honest. Anyhow, he did not respond and that was that. My feelings were not hurt. I actually appreciate him not responding. The last thing I need is for him to feed in to my emotions when I am at a weak point.

I would like to say that I did successfully avoid social activities that I was invited but were taking place in his area of town. I knew if I attended, I would have had a couple of pops, become tipsy and then would have been tempted to call him. So, dodged a major bullet there.

Now, this weekend... I have a social engagement in his neighborhood again, one that I cannot opt out of, however, a very good friend of mine came up to me yesterday and stated that, the minute we embark upon this section of town she would confiscate my phone.

So, again... thanking my lucky stars for good friends. You guys all rock!

Wish me luck and wish me good funny stories to come.

I mean really...

2007-11-08T10:45:00.000-08:00

I was sitting here looking over my last post and just as I was doing that, I looked over and re-read the "about me" section of this blog and it says, "Dixie Carter fan" and well... you know what... Julia Sugarbaker would stick to her guns in my situation. So... I'm looking to her for some inspiration. Julia would have told that man exactly what she needed and never looked back.

Focus... Focus... Focus

Dead Man Walking

2007-11-08T10:23:00.000-08:00

Well, this was kind of a rough week for me. You see, I have had this little love of my life hanging around for about 10 years now and on Monday I felt like it was time that I finally let him go.

I agonized over the decision for the entire weekend. I was sick to my stomach, was in the bathroom every 3 minutes and then crying at night, because I knew I had to tell him exactly how I felt and there was a major chance that my feelings for him would not be reciprocated and I would have to walk away from the relationship.

You see, this kid is that guy that you once dated a long time ago, but now you just hang out when you're single, or not, get drunk and then screw. For me, I went along with this for such a long time, because I felt as though if I pushed for more I would lose this boy forever. I continued to not talk to him when he had a girlfriend and then talk to him again when he was single. This, by the way, did make me feel terrible. I constantly felt as though I was not good enough for him, that I was good enough in the sack but not good enough for anything else.

So, I pulled the trigger, I met him, I told him I wanted more. I told him that I loved him and that I have always loved him, but that the current state of our relationship was stunting other relationships that I had been involved in or might potentially get involved in. Holding on to this boy, never let me fully give myself to anyone else. I always felt this love would be in my life and so I always had a fall back, thus turning most of my relationships in to very shallow encounters. Alas... I do not want that anymore.

What happened... as I suspected... he wants nothing to change. At 36 he is happy with the state of his relationships and our relationship. But, I felt differently and so I told him I would have to leave forever. And I left at that moment. (and then I went home drank a bottle of wine and cried myself to sleep)

Then, something happened, I woke up. I woke up and I was clear. After years of hiding my feelings, they were all out there in the open. I didn't have to be nervous or confused about us anymore. I was honest and open and direct about how I felt and what I needed and it was amazing. I am sure I will get to a point where I will miss my little sweet love, but stick with me girls. I know I can make it through! I know I can stand by my convictions! I know I need more and can get more than a bad drunkin' lay from someone I harbor a deep love for. Right? Right? Tell me I'm right!!?

Ok... may the force be with me...

Tuesday's Rotation on Thursday

2007-11-08T10:10:00.000-08:00

Still mixing it up with the days of the week. Working on one last project and then I hit the road! Have started a club at work, where everyone in the office makes mix cds and passes them around to each other, which means... I have about 55 new songs that I might never have heard. A few of the new items provided by co-workers that are getting heavy rotation.

1) Hot Lunch Jam- Irene Cara- Yeah... this was the song playing in Fame when everyone is dancing around the lunch room. Never thought I would be listening to this at 32.

2) Multiply- Jamie Lidell- much love to my assistant editor, his mix rocks!

3) Private Eyes- Hall and Oates- see above note.

4) Oh My God- Mark Ronson featuring Lily Allen- never listened to hear, except for that time she was on the Today show, but I dig this song.

5) One- Aimee Mann- Such an awesome cover.

By the way... my office is wicked cool!

INFO FROM OUR SENSUAL FUSION GIRLS

2007-11-01T14:29:00.000-07:00

Hey kids... the following is some information you may not know...

Born Cheaters?

In a strange study conducted by Julie Fricker of Swinburne University, while those with “avoidant attachment” behaviors are obvious candidates to stray, it may be those who are the most invested in a relationship that you need to worry about. Surprisingly, those who poured a great deal of time, money, and experience in their relationship were willing to cheat because the consequences of leaving a lover altogether were actually higher than those posed by infidelity. The bottom line? Those committing more facets of their existence to the relationship seem to be the born picks for straying.

Our Taste In Men Is Evolving…

Men with more traditionally feminine features, such as full lips, wider eyes and thin, curved eyebrows were found by a study in the British Personality and Individual Differences Journal to be much more desirable to the average woman as long-term prospective partners than their more masculine full-jawed, larger nosed, smaller eyed counterparts. Feminine facial features and overall healthy appearance seemed to indicate which males were most widely selected as potential mates, contrary to what traditional evolutionary studies may indicate. Here’s to sexual evolution!

All this and more found in Miss Yvonne Sensual Fusion Newsletter.

Tuesday's Rotation on Friday

2007-10-26T12:19:00.001-07:00

Sitting here waiting to be raked over the coals by some jack ass at some network somewhere and decided to download and post Tuesday's rotation today. (since I missed this past Tuesday!)

OK, I am definitely beginning to feel like my old self again. What do I listen to when I am feeling good... 80s! Here you go kids.

1) Girls on Film- Duran Duran- when this video came out it was scandalous! Girl on girl action inside a wrestling ring, pillow fights and guys wearing lots of make-up.

2) Gut Feeling- Devo- Love the Devo and just realized a Devo member writes the music for Wes Anderson's films. I guess that explains why this one was in The Life Aquatic.

3) If You Were Here- Thompson Twins- This is the song that is playing at the end of Sixteen Candles when Sam sees Jake at the church! Love it!

4) Eighties- Killing Joke- Weird Science... party scene... love it!

5) Sugar on My Tongue- Talking Heads- Nothing beats David Byrne. Brilliant.

And one of my favorites lines from an 80s movie...
"Those guys are looking at us!"
"Gross!!! Let's move!"

Can you guess where it's from?

An Announcement from the Sexperts!

2007-10-26T09:07:00.000-07:00

Danielle and Yvonne (see book in the right margin) are pleased to announce the launch of Sensual Fusion Incorporated's website, found at:

http://www.sensualfusion.com

They hope that you'll check it out (pssst - for those of you at work, while its visuals are not "explicit", there is nudity) and pass it along to anyone you know how might be interested in the Sensual Fusion concept, coaching approach, and/or other corporate services (we've got a lot going on!).

Thanks so much!

Wishing you the best,
Yvonne & Danielle

ON SALE AT HALLMARK

2007-10-23T08:27:00.000-07:00

So... time for a new post.

You know there are some things that you kind of always knew about your ex-boyfriends but you never really were able to confirm your instincts. Well, last night I had a case of confirmation.

My last boyfriend, was kind of a nasty, sleazy whore and I knew this going in to the relationship. I mean, I was the home wrecker in the situation busting up his engagement to someone. However, I did really like this guy and we got along very well for a very long time. I feel ok saying this, but I really did love him.

Last night I am having dinner with a family member and she tells me she never liked him, basically because he hit on her while we were going out and then after we broke up he said something to the effect of, "So, now you're cousin and I are not dating, when are we gonna have sex?" These are all things that I did not know about while the two of us were together, but I had a feeling, but then this information was made privy to me last night.

I mean, I thought the news would make me very upset or angry or depressed, but in all honesty, I kind of didn't care. I mean, it's been a while since the relationship and I am pretty content with the way my life is going. I think I finally realized that I am and I was the better person in the relationship and that trashy information solidified that feeling for me. Maybe this doesn't make much sense, but I think having that piece of information has given me a piece of mind I never had as far as the break-up in concerned.

People and relationships can be ugly and mean and nasty, but I must admit, it feels really good to know that you're the bigger person.

I know this all sounds very Hallmark Card-esque, but sometimes that's just the way it goes.

OK girls... off with you, go out with your content heads held high.

Tuesday's Rotation

2007-10-16T12:34:00.000-07:00

OK... I have been out of the loop for a while and haven't had a chance to blog. I mean, I was booked for a hit and run, I failed to show up for a court ordered drug test and both of my children were taken away from me. Wait... that's not me... Anyhow, I'm back on track and listening to the following tunes.

1) Cars that Go Boom- Old School Bass- Loved this song in middle school and just found it again.

2) Shake A Tail feather- Nelly, P Diddy and Murphy Lee- this was in some bad movie that I can't remember, but the song is awesome. Good work out material. If I had any desire to work out, I would totally play this!

3) SexyBack- JT... just because this song is f-ing awesome.

4) Shoop- Salt and Pepa- They got that new reality show coming out and the look on Pepa's face when Salt wants them to perform at her church is priceless.

5) Shut Up and Drive- Rihanna- Been in heavy rotation for a while and I don't think it's going anywhere any time soon.

TIP FROM A READER...

2007-09-20T07:00:00.000-07:00

Very good friend of mine forwarded me the following information. Enjoy... I'm going shopping.

From Women’s Health:

Poll of 1,000 women showed that on average women would abstain from sex for 15 months in exchange for a new wardrobe and 2% would abstain for 3 years. 61% would be more upset about losing their favorite article of clothing ore than not getting sex for one month.

Personally... with the kind of sloppy ridiculous sex I have had lately, I could abstain for much much longer.

Miss Yvonne

2007-09-19T07:29:00.000-07:00

Miss Yvonne's latest Sensual Fusion Newsletter is out and just wanted to give you guys the rundown on what she's talking about right now.

In This Issue:
1. Sex News Updates

2. Q&A of the Week

3. Sexuality Source in the News

4. Announcements/Upcoming Events

5. Shock Talk

6. Product of the Month

Q&A of the Week

I am a thirty five year old woman. When I was a teenager I had gotten on top of my boyfriend. After the fact, he said that I was a maniac while being on top. Twenty years later and I still won't get on top. It has been so long now that I don't know how to get past it in my head. I now want to perform, but my brain will not allow me to feel comfortable doing it. I feel out of place, but I want to. I don't know if I need to be hypnotized or something like that. What do you think? Dying to get on top and climax!! Go to the full newsletter to get the answer.

And don't forget...

SEX FILES: Yvonne & Amy Spencer give you tips on how to handle first-time sex with a new lover, this Wed., Sept. 21st at 2pm ET on Sirius Maxim 108! And to get the full newsletter log on to: sexualitysource.com

GOOOOOO YVONNE! YOU ARE AWESOME!!!

Tuesday's Rotation

2007-09-18T14:29:00.000-07:00

Getting to a really happy and fun place right now and my music is definitely reflective of this. Lots of dancey dancey stuff and in a few more days with the same playlist I might just get to completely happy. Enjoy!!

1) The Girls- Calvin Harris
Good friend of mine and I heard this song at a little bar in the West Village and immediately loved it. Currently playing in heavy rotation.

2) Shut Up and Drive- Rihanna
So much better than Umbrella.

3) Shoes- Kelly
"The shoes are 300 f-ing dollars... let's get 'em." The whole song just makes me smile. Except when it gets to the end and there's all that swearing.

4) Love Cats- The Cure
Just found out that my tickets for The Cure concert that was supposed to be THIS MONTH will now be valid for the rescheduled concert in MAY! I don't know if I can wait that long.

5) Cibo Matto- Speechless
100% fun.

Let's hope all of this happy good times music does not exhaust me and I crash.

FROM THE DESK OF CHERI OTERI

2007-09-14T07:04:00.001-07:00

As far as dating is concerned I have used quite a few techniques in order to snag that certain someone. Whether it is for a date, possible boyfriend potential or a one night stand, I have used quite a few tricks of the trade.

However... there is one thing I haven't tried, well... until last week.

ONLINE DATING

I mean, I always hated the little work conversations about "Match" and discussions about who was talking to whom on match. I just never had a taste for it. But, a few weeks ago I decided, in the name of research to give it a shot. It would be an experience and I pride myself on experiencing as much as possible in this life.

So, found a dating site that was featured on the Today Show. I set up an account, with no picture, just a profile and then a began searching away.

Quicker than I anticipated, I spot someone. Came across a guy, kinda cute, read his profile and he seemed fairly intelligent. I shoot him an email. Nothing crazy, I notice that he's in to music, likes punk as do I, so I tell him about a few clubs in town that have great music. In all honesty, it was kind of like catalog shopping and what woman doesn't like flipping through the pages of the latest JCrew, whether you're buying or not!?

Sent the guy a message, he messages back. We embark upon some decent conversation, but I was still feeling a little weird. I could tell the weirdness though, might eventually fade. After some banter I sent him a pic of myself and my email address, as I did not want to go on to the site any longer (which I will get to in a minute).

Everything seemed harmless and seemed to be going fairly well. But over the next few days something happened. I began receiving tons and tons of messages from people that were on the same dating site. I literally felt as though I was part of an online meat market. I felt like Cheri Oteri bouncing between Will Farrrell and Chris Katan. I realize that by reaching out to someone, I was part of this group as well and maybe that is what bothered me? There was such an influx of desperation and it was all too much too fast. I just wanted to quietly look around and keep to myself.

So, at that point I was completely wigged out and decided that I was done with the online thing. However, I was going to continue talking with the boy I had selected. Why not?

To give you the wrap up, let me just say that there is not going to be any future meetings with this guy. I emailed him, on his profile says he lived in the same town... not true... he lives more than an hour away. He tells me he is going to be coming to my area for 4 days and he wants to catch up. I agree to make a meeting. After I agree, he asked me if it would be ok if his friends came along, then, he asked me if I wanted to bring any of my friends along. Already getting annoyed/bored. I told him that my friends would not be joining us and if he would like to reschedule for another time and spend time with his own friends, then I would have no problem with that .

The day comes that we are supposed to hang out and I call him. He says he should be ready at about 9pm. I decide to take a little nap while I wait, but an hour turns in to two and then I am fast asleep. I then wake up at 245am, realize that the kid tried to call me around 11pm. I text message him, "sorry, i didn't get your message til just now." He calls me as soon as he gets the message and starts apologizing for not catching up, telling me that he does want to meet up, and asks me what i am doing the next day. In all honesty, I didn't care, but why not try for a second meeting?

I message him the next day, tell him I am available after work if he is still interested. Nothing... no reply.

Then, the following day, I get a message from him, he says, he's around and asks if I want to hang out. Even though I am a little weary, I say, "OK... I am available after 3pm." So... what happens... nothing! He never messages back? I mean, what the F? So... it's been a few days and that is the last I have heard from him.

So... what's the point? Do I Internet date? Do I not Internet date? Do I care? I mean, I could have received the above attention from ex-boyfriends that I still have hanging around.

My point, I probably won't attempt online dating in the future. I felt uncomfortable with the meat market aspect and that is something that in the real world I try to avoid. I prefer seeing some one's face, to assess their body language and to do so in public. I'm not saying that online dating is bad, but if you're the kind of person that is pretty secure with yourself without a boyfriend or you're outgoing, you are probably going to be disappointed.

Plus, I meet people easily and I don't want to take away from the girls out there that don't. I think the online dating thing is good for people that are not thrust in to social situations on a weekly basis or need to ease in to something rather than just attacking guys and slapping big wet sloppy kisses on them.

So... that's it me and online dating... totally broken up!

Tuesday's Rotation

2007-09-05T15:25:00.000-07:00

Well... I have been a little slammed with work this week and last, so I slacked a little with the dating blog item, but one WILL BE POSTED by the end of the evening. In the meantime, here's a quick hit of what music is currently in the Tuesday Rotation:

1) To Zion- Lauryn Hill
Just got reacquainted with the Miseducation of Lauryn Hill and now I cannot put it away. One of the best CDs of all time.

2) Driving with the Brakes On- Del Amitri
Yeah, this band... had that Roll To Me Song, a million years ago. I never thought twice them. You know, they were out when all those "number" bands came out... Third Eye Blind, Three Doors Down, Seven Mary Three. Heard the acoustic of this song while I was sitting in a pub one evening and I loved it. It's been somewhere in the rotation since.

3) You'll Lose a Good Thing- Barbara Lynn
It's an oldie that I am putting on a mix CD for my father. It's very 1963 slow dance in the high school gym. Love it.

4) Rock 'N Roll Suicide- Seu Jorge from The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
Maybe it's the whole Owen Wilson news, but who cares, Portuguese covers of Bowie tunes are amazing!!

5) Sharpshooter- Bloody Social
Fun, dirty, punky, sleeping with models kind of band.

IN THE NEWS...

2007-08-30T13:28:00.000-07:00

Hey all! Great friend of mine is a wonderful source for answers to all things sex related. You can often find her doing a talk back on the Today show, an interview for the September issue of Cosmo or yapping away on her Sirius Maxim 108 radio show. She has given my blog a shout out in her newsletter so I'm giving her a shout out on my blog.

To subscribe to her newsletter go to: www.sexualitysource.com

Items in this month's newsletter include answers to the following:
To Snip or Not to Snip and How Badly do You Want those Boobies?

Another great feature is Product of the Week which this week happens to be:

Andrew Geoffrey Vineyards offers aphrodisiac quality boutique wines with Old World flair. Visit http://www.andrewgeoffrey.com to order yours. Raise your serotonin levels and satisfy your palate with this perfect Napa Valley Cabernet Sauvignon accompaniment. There’s not a bad vintage in the lot from this very limited, select vintner. We recently had the privilege of being wined and dined by the winemaker himself, and can attest that pairing a glass with dark chocolate for an anti-oxidant mega-dose is out of this world…

Tuesday's Rotation

2007-08-28T11:35:00.000-07:00

Let's just say I was in a bit of a funk this week and my musical selections from the pod reflect this. So, sorry they're a bit of a downer, but looks as though I am on an up-cycle so next week, hopefully will be a bit more upbeat...

1) Head Over Heels- Tears for Fears
Not only feeling a bit down, but nostalgic as well. However, this is still one of the best songs ever made.

2) Stockholm Syndrome- Yo La Tengo
"No don't warn me I know it's wrong, but I swear it won't take long." As the previous post should alert you, this could be my theme song.

3) I Just Don't Think I'll Ever Get Over Losing You- Colin Hay
I know... sad, right?

4) When Your Minds Made Up- Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova
The Soundtrack to "Once," you must get it now.

5) Liar- Built to Spill- My BFF turned me on to this band. Reminds me of the two of us listening to The Ocean Blue in high school.

Memo from the Office of Job Placement

2007-08-26T11:56:00.000-07:00

So I have had some pretty good break up lines administered to me in the past, but lines for me to stay are few and far between. However, I do have one really good one that makes me laugh to this day.

I used to be cutie cute and of course had no idea. I was seeing a guy who was on the rebound and of course, I didn't care. All I wanted was a fun fling with an honesty challenged attorney. Yes, he had his faults but to give him credit, he was smart and funny, argumentative, great in the sack and he lived around the corner from me, which I thought was great placement. Later I learned, it was not.

I could tell the boy (36 years old) was definitely hiding a few things. What tipped me off was whenever we would go back to his house, his phone would ring non-stop. Then he used the excuse that his contractor was calling him. If you have ever waited for a contractor to call then you know, that you will skip meals, call in sick to work and wait three days to use the bathroom because you're waiting for that call. But as I said, I was younger and really didn't care.

Now, as I said, this guy was a lawyer and well, I had some lawyer acquaintances of my own, one who happened to be looking for work in the same area of practice as the boy. We'll call this friend, Michele and I introduced them to each other and he really had some good ins for her.

So we're hanging out, watching Red Sox games, drinking wine, having great sex while his phone rang 30 times in a row in the background.

Then, one morning, I was done. I was sick of the phone calls and after a few weeks that telephone ring gets annoying. I confronted the situation. What did I care? I really had nothing to lose, except for some good sex and man... I kind of wish I would have gotten one more session in before I left. But, I laid down the law and promptly got out of bed and started getting dressed and told him I was out of there.

Now, at this point, a guy who wants to salvage the relationship might say something like, "No... please... wait, I want to be with you" maybe "I'll deal with the situation" or possibly "Let's talk about it" but oh no, instead this lawyer's argument was, "But Michele needs a job!" It took a few minutes to process and then I realized this was his argument for me to stay. I shook my head laughed to myself and walked out.

I would like to say that this was the end of our relationship but unfortunately, due to my lack of self control, I did see this person again and THEN the relationship ended. Apparently, after I walked out that morning, he did not deal with the situation. I saw him again and while I was walking home from his house a strange woman followed me back to my house in her car. Then... that was the point the relationship ended.

So... please tell me... someone else out there has laughed about an outgoing Hail Mary excuse. And follow up question does anyone else out there have a similar lack of self control? Or am I the only goober in the bunch?

Extra Extra

2007-08-23T08:53:00.001-07:00

Defamer has the best Brady baby blurb today. Just wanted to share.

Bridget Moynihan's publicist isn't telling the world the name of the actress's just-delivered baby. We suspect it's because she's trying convince Moynihan that while calling the boy Fuck Tom Brady might feel good right now, she'll probably regret it the moment she signs the birth certificate.

Nice!

Tuesday's Rotation

2007-08-21T07:34:00.001-07:00

As I stated before, a little music will be involved in this blog as well. So, on Tuesdays I'll give you a little run down on what's playing in Rowdy Girl's rotation. Unfortunately, it's not Shaun Cassidy, but the minute I post this, I am going to search for him on iTunes. Anyhow... top five most played songs in the pod are...

Everyday I Love you Less and Less- The Kaiser Chiefs ...Standard song to run to, but be warned you may unknowingly begin to sing this aloud.
Young Folks- Peter Bjorn and John... I'm a little over it, but I can't control the tracks in the "most played" section.
Out of the Races and on to the Tracks- The Rapture... The most energetic, dirty, sexy band ever.
Girls & Boys- Blur... GIRLS WHO ARE BOYS, WHO LIKE BOYS TO BE GIRLS, WHO DO BOYS LIKE THEY'RE GIRLS...
Devil's A Go-Go- Blitzen Trapper... This band's out of Portland, OR, love their stuff, they rock out but they get a little hippie sometimes, which actually, I don't mind.

FROM THE OFFICE OF THE PARKING CLERK

2007-08-16T10:03:00.000-07:00

The thing is... guys aren't the only ones who need a little non- committal action and they aren't the only ones that, after the action has been had, need that one night stand to hit the bricks. Unfortunately, there are times when that guy you picked up, just can't get to steppin' fast enough.

Here's the story, I was trying to get over an ex and decided one way to do so, was to go out, grab a guy and have a fun filled night of dirty sex. That's right, dirty sex, because when you're drinking beers at a show at a dive bar, there's nothing sweet or clean about it.

OK, spotted the guy... tall, cute AND alone, (no friends or girlfriends to compete with). Made my move and before I knew it, I was making him buy me a slice after the show and telling him he was giving me a ride home from the bar.

We get to my house which is located in a section of the city with absolutely no on-street parking. So, I tell him to come in, but that there's no need to look for parking, he can just leave the car double parked with the hazards on. Which, should translate to: "YOU WILL NOT BE STAYING HERE LONG", right?

We get in to my house and I put the moves on him, no conversation, no banter. We start making out and then we hit my bedroom, I grab a condom and tell him to put it on and then... it happened.

He apologized.

Apology? for what? Oh, I get it, it's over. And now, here is the issue... I have no desire to try for round 2, I certainly don't want a discussion, and I definitely don't want him spending the night and attempting the obligatory pity sex the next morning so he can save face. All I want to do is try to salvage that half empty carton of ice cream that has been in my freezer for 6 months, sit on my couch, watch some south park and pass out.

But alas, it was not that simple. He wanted to talk and he wanted to talk about the fact that he wasn't sure what was going on with his GIRLFRIEND at the moment! Next he asked for my number! Actually, he said, "Hey, I don't even have your number!" as to which my response was, "Oh, don't worry about it." Come on, it's 2am and I have received a big fat nothing from this escapade, do we really need to exchange digits? However, he was mortified by my response. I took his number.

I couldn't figure out what this guy was still doing in my living room. Thankfully I had office of the parking clerk on my side, because I told him he was probably going to be ticketed for double parking and he actually took this hint and left.

My question is this, is there some way to push a one night stand out of bed? What are your obligations to the ONS? Or is this just what we have to put up with in order to get some non committal action? Sort of like Russian Roulette. I mean, you got someone who wants to play, but you don't know what they're playing with til you get them home.

OK... I know you girls have some stories out there, so... let me hear them.

Up We Go

2007-08-13T18:58:00.000-07:00

This is my first blog post, so please, chicas, bear with me. I am starting this blog, because, if you know me, you know that I have accumulated quite a few bizarre and amusing stories throughout my dating career and by sharing those stories I hope to find out, for myself, if I am alone in my comical yet sometimes freakish dating world.

Also, I really want people to laugh when they read this blog and occasionally walk away with some insight into dating. When I can, I will enlist some expert friends to weigh in on specific dating issues, so hopefully some legitimate info will be passed along to all of you reading.

This blog will also have some posts that reflect my own personal interests, like music and politics, but the main focus will be telling dating stories, the good, the bad and the one about the time I woke up after a romp and found a stuffed animal lying next to my head.

If any of you have suggestions for this blog, please pass them on to me and wish me luck in to this endeavor.